You have to feel sorry for those poor bastards staffing call centres across the country (and around the world — thanks to the miracle of modern technology, your dinner can now be interrupted as easily from Bangalore, India as from Brampton, Ontario). Low pay, repetitive and boring work, and of course all the verbal abuse you can eat.
The magic incantation when those calls come is, in theory, the phrase “Please put me on your do-not-call list.” Utter this phrase, and that company will never bother you again. After all, the Canadian Marketing Association’s code of ethics clearly states “Marketers will promptly remove from their lists the telephone numbers of consumers who request them to do so.”
Need a few seconds to wipe those tears of laughter away? No prob. I’ll wait.
As more consumers learn about the Magic Phrase, companies are adjusting — for instance, by trying to talk you out of it. A few months ago, one of my unsolicited evening guests responded to it by saying, “I’m required to inform you of the consequences of being on this list. If we put you on the do-not-call list, you will no longer receive calls from us!” Presumably this person also goes around warning drivers that if they press their accelerators, their cars will speed up.
But Pacific Press, publishers of The Province and The Vancouver Sun, took the cake the other night. Their telemarketer informed me that the Magic Phrase would take me off their phone list… but only for this campaign. It was a do-not-call list with the lifespan of a mayfly.
Federal legislation? It can’t come fast enough.
